Yesterday morning went up the road & bought
a small loaf of rye bread
a loaf of thick sliced white bread
2 jars of red wine with mushrooms pasta sauce (on special)
a twin pack of printed paper towels (also on special)
2L of skim milk
3 bananas
3 apples
Totally mundane; except it's an indication of me in denial. No lemons, no aspirin, both of which I was out of. Which is why I ended up later in the day scavenging through the bathroom drawers & swallowing some codeine that I found there.
I should have known better. I've been a heavy smoker for 50 years, wheeze when I breathe & have the appropriate smoker's cough for the length of the addiction. Oxygen deprivation factor #1. I currently have a very heavy chest flu – Odf #2 – that in concert with #1 means that when I cough I feel my head is going to go spinning off. Heavy codeine use, as I discovered earlier this year when I collapsed in a hotel bathroom in Sydney after several days of self-medication for an abcessed tooth, is Odf #3. &, apparently, even light codeine use, when combined with the other two, also impedes the flow of oxygen.
Which is probably why I found myself on the kitchen floor this morning, with no recollection of the descent. Only the coughing fit at the beginning, & me sitting on my arse at the end.
It's about time I stopped pretending I am invincible.
Scary. I hate to think of you out on the floor way over there in Oz, and me not being able to do anything about it.
ReplyDeleteI wish you were in vincible
But you're not.
I hope you'll be feeling better soon.
As for hopes for your well-being, so do we. I just wish there were a way to morph pahtos from apparent a- to active em-.
ReplyDeletecommiserations also ... I want to ring you up but don't have your phone # ... get well soon.
ReplyDelete